Choosing the Right Therapist: Why It Matters So Much
A 60-minute session on finding the right person to talk to: the therapist who judged you, the one you found on Instagram, the degree you never checked, the session in English when you think in Hindi, the price tag, the secrets you hold back, and the awkward business of leaving. What makes a stranger trustworthy with your mind, and how would you even know? Twelve independent cards; open three or four.
The opening question
When you meet a new doctor, barber or mechanic, what's the first thing that tells you whether you'll trust them?
Everyone in the room answers this in one line before any card is opened. Write the answers down; you will come back to them.
The cards
12 ways into the topic
Each card is independent. Your group votes on which to open, and four or five is plenty for an hour. Behind every card sit three prompts, one at a time, that only appear once it is opened on the board. Unopened cards keep for next time.
- 1
Leaving Your Therapist
You've seen the same therapist for two months. She's nice. But it isn't really working, and you dread telling her.
- 2
When A Therapist Judges You
You finally tell a therapist something private, like not wanting to get married. She pauses, then says, “But think of your parents.”
- 3
Checking Their Qualifications
You find a counsellor online. Kind voice, good reviews, fair price. You never ask where they trained or what their degree is.
- 4
Therapists On Instagram
You've watched a therapist's reels for months. She's funny, wise, and says exactly what you feel. So you book a session with her.
- 5
Therapy In Your Own Language
You think in Hindi, or Tamil, or Bengali. But your therapist only speaks English. So you translate every feeling in your head before you say it.
- 6
A Therapist From Your Background
You're looking for a therapist. You catch yourself wondering: will they get my family, my religion, my kind of life?
- 7
A Therapist Younger Than You
You're 45, married for twenty years, with two teenagers. The therapist who greets you looks about 26. She isn't married and has no children.
- 8
Advice Or Just Listening
You tell the therapist your problem. You wait for them to tell you what to do. Instead they ask, “What do you think you should do?”
- 9
Lying To Your Therapist
Your therapist asks how your week was. It was terrible. You smile and say, “Better, actually.” You're not even sure why.
- 10
Paying More For Therapy
One therapist charges ₹800 a session. Another charges ₹3,500. Both have kind faces and good reviews.
- 11
Trusting Them With Secrets
You tell your therapist something you've never told anyone. A week later you find out your cousin sees the same therapist.
- 12
Liking Your Therapist Is Overrated
You love your therapist. She's warm, she gets you, and you leave every session feeling lighter.
The line to leave with
If the person you were paying to understand you didn't, would you be able to tell, and would you ever say so?
More boards,more ways in.
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